Greetings, viewers.
Yes we are aware that we're about four days late in delivering the top songs of 2010, but better late than never as we always say ('and this is why no one reads your stupid blog', as everyone else always says).
If you remember correctly, for 2008 and 2009 we compiled the year's top 20 best songs, whereas this year we've simply done 15. Why, you ask? Because we frankly couldn't find five other songs that we liked enough to name some of the year's best. Now there were a lot of great pop songs released in 2010, don't get us wrong. There just simply were only 15 great pop songs as opposed to 20 great pop songs. We hope this makes sense.
ANYWAY.
What did we learn in 2010?
We learned that Lady Gaga is actually not as bad as we originally thought, and this was the year that definitely changed our minds on that. We learned that everyone and their mother has officially jumped on board the electro, dance-pop train and while this gives us much to be pleased about as we thoroughly enjoy that sort of music, it's also leading to some rather irritating results (see Akon and numerous other dickheads' collaborations with David Guetta). We learned that Katy Perry can put out a good pop single when she puts her mind (or her firework-spouting tits) to it. We learned that Kylie is as lovely as ever. And we also learned that the Black Eyed Peas have no problem continuing their claim to the BIGGEST PILE OF SHIT stakes in current music.
With that being said, here are Mp3's and Cookies' Top 15 Best Songs of 2010:
1. SOPHIE ELLIS-BEXTOR “Bittersweet”
To put it simply, this is just an f-ing great pop song. To put it less simply, this is a straight-for-the-jugular, no-holds-barred, “one for the gays” barnstorming club monster. As per usual, Sophie’s posh phrasing and ice queen delivery are simply too delicious to resist, all while 4x4 drum kicks thud restlessly about her. As a footnote, there are two good versions of this track. The original radio edit is a pleasant, jangly disco number, but it’s the Freemasons remix that really does the business. Massive, apocalyptic synths draped elegantly over thunder-clad beats – this is the stuff that dancefloor dreams are made of.
2. MARINA AND THE DIAMONDS “I Am Not A Robot”
Welsh-Greek singer Marina's brand of quirky and occasionally cartoony pop really struck a chord in 2010. Backed by one of the year’s best music videos, “I Am Not A Robot” encourages listeners to just be themselves and other sort of inspirational banter. Her vocals occasionally veer into the slightly annoying Alanis Morissette yodel, but her earnest conviction makes it one of 2010’s most heartfelt pop moments.
3. ALPHABEAT “The Spell”
Spunky dance music from the early ‘90s was in full-swing on Alphabeat’s sophomore effort, The Beat Is…, and “The Spell” was just the perfect example of how the Danish group knows their way around some great pop tunes. Punnery aside, “The Spell” works its magic right from the get-go with its sugary vocals, twinkling piano riffs and relentlessly catchy chorus.
4. LADY GAGA feat. BEYONCE “Telephone”
Though not quite the Earth-shattering collaboration that everyone imagined, “Telephone” nonetheless showcased Gaga’s unwavering ability to deliver a surefire pop smash. You can sort of imagine that the guy who’s on the receiving end of her exasperated pleas to stop calling will probably understand her need to just dance if he heard just ten seconds of the song’s Europop rushes.
5. MINI VIVA “One Touch”
Poised to capture the British music scene in 2010 with their brand of spunky Xenomania-helmed pop perfection, Mini Viva was dropped not long after the chart failure of “One Touch”. A shame, really, because this grinding ‘80s-inspired glamfest is one of the catchiest British pop songs in years. Where “Tokyo” felt a bit under-produced at times, “One Touch” is stuffed to the gills with buzzing synths, ridiculous raps and a natty chorus that had us singing “Hips, lips, fashion status” for months. All mourn the fall of la Viva.
6. FLORENCE + THE MACHINE “Cosmic Love”
English crooner Florence Welch bewitched critics and fans alike on both sides of the Atlantic with her gorgeous debut, Lungs. This theatrically epic ballad, dressed with lush synthesizers and Welch’s dreamy yelp, dispels the argument that 21st century pop can't possibly be viewed as serious art.
7. NATALIA KILLS “Zombie”
"I'm in love with a zombie", she sings through a heavily Autotuned filter, and with that Natalia Kills has summed up a strange obsession with the living dead that has permeated pop culture for the past few years. The cold, detached electro production give the track a sparse, empty feel, perfectly complimenting the singer's lamenting of a soulless lover. Definitely an artist to watch out for in 2011.
8. KYLIE MINOGUE “Get Outta My Way”
Kylie’s sunniest effort since the now-classic “Love At First Sight” is also her most euphoric since the aforementioned track. Miz Minogue’s sassy defiance suits her extremely well here, and “Get Outta My Way” is really just the perfect sum-up of all that we love about Kylie: classy, crisp dance-pop with her sparkling personality shining right through.
9. HURTS “Wonderful Life”
Wistful and gorgeously subdued, “Wonderful Life” takes a different approach to the year’s endless barrage of in-your-face club stompers and instead shows the beautiful settings that electronic music can conjure up.
10. RIHANNA “Rude Boy”
What started off as a fan-favorite from the polarizing Rated R album turned into one of Ri-Ri’s biggest hits in years. “Rude Boy” mixed low-slung R&B with Caribbean grooves, dominated by a great keyboard riff during the chorus and some rather naughty lyrics about loving a dominating pervert. A line such as “I like the way you pull my hair" do make things a bit awkward if you take into account some of Rihanna’s previous headlines with a certain fist-happy ex-boyfriend, but as a pop song it is more than just a little listenable.
11. MARINA + THE DIAMONDS “Mowgli’s Road”
A jangly, piano-driven anthem for anyone who’s felt out of place and trying to “discover” themselves, and in case you thought it wasn’t weird enough there are some creepy animal noises and gremlin-like whispers scattered throughout.
12. THE TING TINGS “Hands”
The buzz band of 2008 returned this year with “Hands”, throwing away the guitars in favor of analog keyboards. In a musical climate that sees everyone jumping on board the dance music bandwagon, the electro-heavy “Hands” manages to stand out thanks to the band’s clever lyricisms and Teuton techno strains.
13. KATY PERRY “Teenage Dream”
Mrs. Russell Brand’s call-to-arms for adolescent romancers is much like teenhood itself - frivolous, oozing at the pores with hormones, and a bit annoying after a while, but ultimately exhilarating and full of starry-eyed hopefulness. We aren’t denying that she can certainly be an irritating figure within the pop realm, but we also aren’t afraid of admitting that she pulled a doozy on us this year with “Teenage Dream”.
14. M.I.A. “XXXO”
Two years since she jetted from the blogosphere to the top 10 with the ubiquitous "Paper Planes", everyone's favorite (and probably only) Sri Lankan popstar returned with "XXXO" – a dark, throbbing piece of electropop that takes a different step from her trademark hip-hop-meets-world-music sound, and yet maintains her distinct guerilla approach to pop music.
15. ROBYN “Hang With Me”
We confess that Robyn’s Body Talk campaign didn’t bowl us over like most other critics, but one track that did grab our attention was “Hang With Me”. Here she ponders the risks of falling in love, and when she sings “just don’t fall recklessly, helplessly in love with me”, she speaks volumes about the trials and pitfalls of modern romance.
Pop was a different breed of beast back in 2001. The teenyboppers like Britney, *N Sync and Christina were slowly beginning to step towards ‘maturity’ (which back in those days meant bribing R&B producers to hand over their latest work to you and sexing things up even more than usual), and hip-hop was continuing its stratospheric rise as the dominant force in popular music. Overseas, Kylie’s comeback wagon was already trucking along with the success of her 2000 LP, Light Years, so massive anticipation awaited her in Europe and her native Australia when “Can’t Get You Out of My Head” began to rear its devious head. But for the song to achieve the success it did on American shores in early 2002 is something very curious indeed. When Britney’s third album failed to produce any top ten hits and *N Sync abruptly opted for a permanent hiatus, it was clear that 2002 would see the first nails being hammered into the pop coffin. With such a musical landscape, what could US audiences want with a relatively unknown Aussie in her ‘30s tramping around to a silly Eurodisco tune? We’re still not sure of the reasons why, but for one of the very few times in modern history, Americans actually paid attention to something brilliant.
Because, as we all know, “Can’t Get You Out of My Head” was not some silly Eurodisco tune. It was a slinky earworm that gradually lodged itself into the subconscious until people outside of the gay club scene were walking around humming “la la la” to themselves without even realizing. The song dripped with pure sex – from Kylie’s breathy sighs to the undulating bass throb that was engineered specifically for the grinding of crotches. The song also had some ominous undertones. Its tale of lustful obsession and the rather dark lyric “It’s more than I dare to think about” is testament to this. 